I am writing today to pay homage to the smart guy. Some may irreverently refer to him as the ‘nerd’ the ‘nice guy’, or simply ‘not my type’. I have heard these phrases uttered time and again by the ordinary woman and the famous. Sit and think about all of the ‘good girls’ loving bad boys. I call it the “Whitney/Bobby Syndrome”. Once you’ve caught it, it takes decades of therapy to clear up and your career may never recover.
That’s another post, another time.
I am writing today to champion the guy whose appeal is his mind, the “righteous” brother.
I recently met a guy I thought was nice. We spoke a few times over the phone. I started to inquire about his hopes, dreams, and goals. I told him I was in grad school. He began to mention his poor academic performance. I thought okay red flag but surely he has evolved since undergrad. He had not.
The conversation soon deteriorated as he mentioned having to take an exam for work that he was sure he was going to fail. I tried to encourage him. I told him to believe in himself and offered a few study tips. He then bemoaned studying, frequently stating how he HATED to read. I was starting to get that feeling in my gut. So I thought switch the subject. The political race. Surely this would elicit some spirited debate.
Not a chance. This guy actually stated that he does not follow politics. That would have been fine in 2000 maybe, but in this historic election, such blatant ignorance was too much to stomach. I made up an excuse to get off the phone and never spoke to him again.
I told my best friend this tale, who derided my decision. She said I should give him a chance. Is it wrong that my primary attraction to a man is his intellect? Have an opinion, an independent thought. Heck, read a book! Just look at my list above and then you can see why anything less just will not do.
Photo by Robert Clark
Michael Eric Dyson