I am up at 10:37 PM when I should be asleep, thinking. I was thinking about how disappointment comes in waves. They are big, boisterous and all encompassing. Imagine being a voyager in the middle of your nautical journey when a big wind blows in a tempest. What do you do?  Do you tuck tail & sail and go back in the direction you came? Or do you forge ahead knowing that behind those rain clouds, as big and ugly as they may be, is a sun. It was shining before the storm, it was shining during the storm, and it will shine after the clouds have rolled away.

I feel like Peter. I was so Peter for the longest time in my walk with Christ. I was so sure my faith was so rock solid, I could confidently say, “Sure, Jesus. I’ll come walk on that water with you.” Then the the waves came. And they kept coming. I took my eyes off the Son. All I could see were dark clouds. I felt the wind knocking me off my mark. I tried in my own strength to walk but the water rushed to me knees. I kept thinking, “Why would the Lord call me out of the comfort of my boat only to watch me fail?” It was then revealed that I took my eyes off of the Lord and tried to walk in my own strength.

“Jesus! Save me!”

It is the only strength I have left – to call out to the master. I wanted to be strong. I wanted to succeed. I wanted to walk on water. My mistake – I started to rely on me.

Jesus reached out his hand and helped me up. Wobbly and shaken, I am learning to stand. I know that without Him, I will fall. I just need to sharpen my focus. No matter the opposing forces, they are only distractions. Stay the course. Jesus is the author and the finisher of our faith. (Hebrews 12:2). He set you out on the path of righteousness, he will see that you make it safely to the other side.