My birthday is coming up in a few days and I am passing a milestone so to speak. There is one thing about milestones, they cause you to do a lot of reflecting.
It seems like for every major situation in my life, I always screw up the first go 'round. It takes years to get a second chance but when I do I knock it out of the park.
Let me explain.
I wrote a post about my first love and how I have kinda been quick to call it quits with a guy as to not fall down that slippery slope again. Why? Because love makes you an illogical mess. Subsequently, I deleted it. Partially because my blog is semi-anonymous and I have not quite decided on how personal I want to be on here.
Anyway, this first love was always in and out of my life (not physically, I don't play that crap) but emotionally. So when I started seeing this other guy (dude B) I was not quite over dude A. Hey but I was in young(er) and thought, I can see Dude B until I get over Dude A.
Um yeah, that doesn't work.
So me being a novice at the dating game, I had a situation where dude A and dude B ended up at my sister's house with me (I was babysitting) at the same time and neither would leave. Dude A had shown up unannounced, like he had for years. I, like the novice I was, opened the door to tell him sorry I have company (dude B) so go home. He side-stepped me and came on in.
Long story short, both of these guys were sitting in the living room and neither would leave. The kids were upstairs sleeping and I was seriously trying to avoid a Jerry Springer-styled incident. So after sitting in the middle like a dummy for a minute, I asked Dude B to leave.
He never spoke to me again. Ever.
Dude A was not my boyfriend anymore, was not faithful, was not dependable, was not even cute (had a kick-butt body though, lol).
Dude B was really handsome, really nice, an entrepreneur, really tall and we got along great (we were friends first). He was all those things but at the fork in the road, I made the wrong choice. I have subsequently dated guys: some handsome, some cool but never all in one package like dude B.
So back to me crossing that milestone, I think I am ready for my second act but how can I trust myself to make the right decision, if standing at that fork again? Have you ever made the wrong choice and what was your second act?
I made a similar mistake about 10 years ago. I was engaged to a really great guy (not all that handsome but a great person emotionally, spiritually, and intellectually). I didn’t really want to be; I wanted to be single again and actually began seeing another guy at the same time we were engaged. Well, long story short, at that fork in the road I left my 2 1/2 year relationship just to embrace men that certainly didn’t love me like my ex-fiance’ did. I haven’t had a second act yet in terms of longevity in a relationship like that, but he got married and now he and his wife have a beautiful 5-month-old daughter. I’m still kicking myself and hoping that love comes around again someday.
It will. I guess those are the breaks sometimes, but I believe in second chances.